Understanding Emotional Injury

Emotional injury to self and individual grief are of a personal nature, the very thing that makes abandonment grief different from all others and provides you with a powerful incentive to begin the healing process.

You will be motivated to find a greater life and love than before, not in spite of the rejection you incurred but because of it.

What follows is an inventory of “I” words associated with abandonment’s inner process to help you recognise its characteristics and alert you to it’s pitfalls.

The inner process for all of us will range from self blame, criticism, hopelessness to a critical inner voice. Similarly, the external aspects of self injury can result in behaviours that are detrimental to a full recovery These behaviours can manifest in over use of alcohol, partaking of illicit drugs, risk taking behaviours , either sexually or physically, i.e. dangerous driving .

Positive and nurturing self behaviours can be having a massage, exercise, listening to music, meditation, yoga , reading and being in the company of positive and supportive family and friends,

As you become more conscious of the ways in which abandonment can damage your sense of self, you will actively intercept and refute its negative messages and avoid internalising them.

Idealising the Abandoner

Identity Crisis

Impotent Rage


Internalising Rejection


Isolation and Shame

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